I defiantly believe in love at first sight.
Cause the moment you caught my eye I knew you'd be mine.
Those glossy brown eyes, them perfectly formed lips.
I was hooked on you after our first kiss.
I held you in my arms erver so close.
Taking in your smell, inspecting you from head to toe.
You are everything and more that I expected.
Your showing me what love really is.
When you look at me I see your love so clear, no doubt in my mind that you want me here.
This feeling is so overwhelming, I'm bursting with love for my beautiful children.
xxx
Wednesday, 11 January 2012
Faith
My faith in God is what drives me.
I know He'll provide all my needs.
He is one I can always depend on, even when I'm right or wrong His by my side all day long.
His words are what comforts me, when I'm down and out He brings me to my feet.
My conversations with Him give me strength through Him I'm sure I will rise again.
My eyes are fixed on seeking His face, even when I make mistakes.
I know His love is never ending and my victory is just pending.
If I continue to follow His word, keep my faith and trust in the Lord my blessing will flow forever more.
I know He'll provide all my needs.
He is one I can always depend on, even when I'm right or wrong His by my side all day long.
His words are what comforts me, when I'm down and out He brings me to my feet.
My conversations with Him give me strength through Him I'm sure I will rise again.
My eyes are fixed on seeking His face, even when I make mistakes.
I know His love is never ending and my victory is just pending.
If I continue to follow His word, keep my faith and trust in the Lord my blessing will flow forever more.
In The Dark
As I lay in the dark trying to comprehend that I will no longer see my friend.
I think of all the times we shared the good, the bad, the unprepared.
You loved me as your own you took me in opened your home.
As the years went on we grew so close became that friend I loved the most.
There for me through thick and thin I don't know where I would have been. If you had not held my hand carried me through always there to understand.
Picked me up and dried my tears always told me have no fear.
Now I feel so lost and lonely I no longer have Carol to hold me, but my memories of you will live on I love you even more each day your gone.
As I lay in the dark trying to comprehend that I will no longer see my friend.
I think of all the times we shared the good, the bad, the unprepared.
You loved me as your own you took me in opened your home.
As the years went on we grew so close became that friend I loved the most.
There for me through thick and thin I don't know where I would have been. If you had not held my hand carried me through always there to understand.
Picked me up and dried my tears always told me have no fear.
Now I feel so lost and lonely I no longer have Carol to hold me, but my memories of you will live on I love you even more each day your gone.
As I lay in the dark trying to comprehend that I will no longer see my friend.
Love
Love is not just a word that we use.
It's only meant to be said when the words are true.
Hearts are often broken, when the word love is abused.
Using love as a tool, to get you what you want so you say 'I love you'
Love is not just a word that we use.
Sometimes people don't understand the pain we go through, when we here those deadly words.....
'I LOVE YOU'
It's only meant to be said when the words are true.
Hearts are often broken, when the word love is abused.
Using love as a tool, to get you what you want so you say 'I love you'
Love is not just a word that we use.
Sometimes people don't understand the pain we go through, when we here those deadly words.....
'I LOVE YOU'
Crying
My stomach tightens my eyes fill with tears, my head starts to spin I'm overcome by fear.
All logic is gone I become numb, what do I do? What did I do wrong?
My mind is clouded with fear and doubt, as I go through this mental drought.
I try to be strong, I try not to worry, I try to smile but the pain takes over me.
Standing alone in this house crying so hard no noise comes out.
I get down on my knees praying to God He takes this pain from me.
All logic is gone I become numb, what do I do? What did I do wrong?
My mind is clouded with fear and doubt, as I go through this mental drought.
I try to be strong, I try not to worry, I try to smile but the pain takes over me.
Standing alone in this house crying so hard no noise comes out.
I get down on my knees praying to God He takes this pain from me.
Confusion
I have a problem and can't seem to find a solution, now I'm faced with all this confusion.
Battling with my head and my heart, I really don't know where to start.
I need some help I need some guidance, I need some noise within this silence.
Life is taking a toll on me, I just want to be set free.
Confusion in my mind searching for a love I can not find.
Confusion in my soul can't seem to find my way back home.
I'm lost, I'm crying, I'm slowly dying, I'm so fed up with all this lying.
Lost myself in the eye of the storm and I'm not sure I can grow no more.
Battling with my head and my heart, I really don't know where to start.
I need some help I need some guidance, I need some noise within this silence.
Life is taking a toll on me, I just want to be set free.
Confusion in my mind searching for a love I can not find.
Confusion in my soul can't seem to find my way back home.
I'm lost, I'm crying, I'm slowly dying, I'm so fed up with all this lying.
Lost myself in the eye of the storm and I'm not sure I can grow no more.
Friday, 6 January 2012
My Thoughts
So much has happened in the last 3 months I feel so completely lost and disconnected with myself. They say grief makes you do weird things I guess it must be true cause I've done unthinkable things. My guilt is eating away at me. I have no one to blame but myself, I had a choice and I choose to do wrong. In life we try to make excuses for our wrong actions but there is no excuse. Even now as I feel guilty all I can think about is doing it again and that makes me feel even more guilty. I wish I had more discipline, more courage to walk away from the easy option, the wrong option and stick it out with the right option. Having faith that God will make a way for me. At times I feel like such a failure, a fraud, a phony. Living with all these secrets eats me up inside. I wanna scream from the roof tops this is ME and this is what I've done like it or hate it but at least you know. One day I know I will find peace I just pray that God will forgive me and let me into His paradise. I fear that I've done so much wrong that I will not get that opportunity and that my punishment will be unbearable. I pray for wisdom to make the right choices, guidance to help me find my way and discipline to follow the word of God and none other.
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